Saving My Thoughts For Tonight

Saving My Thoughts For Tonight
Sep. 6th, 2008 at 2:44 PM
I have a lot that I have already written this morning but I just don't have time to post it right now. I will post it tonight. Well I didn't get a picture of the inside of the store today, because I left my phone, I will have to take one tommorrow.


I have so many valid reasons to just hate this world. I could not look you in the eye and tell you that I like the world I am living in. It is not like I am living in heaven so what did I expect a bed of roses. I don't think life can be perfect as long as you are living on earth, their will always be an antagonist everywhere you go. I sometimes say what is a world without a villian or an antagonist. I don't think you could live without one. If I would have never been born, I would not have to worry about all this. But I don't blame my mother and father because I know they weren't thinking at the time, I understand that things happen. So, as of now I don't have any children, and if I don't have any in the future it would probably be for the best. You sometimes think they are not here right now, but if they were would they really want to be here, because I know I don't with all of this violence. If I wasn't never born, I don't think I would want to be born But, now that I am here I am just going to have live in it and there is no other way. I definitely would not want to take my own life on purpose no matter how terrible it may seems. It's bad but it is not worth me taking my own life, I am just going to let it happended naturally. I have made a promise to myself, and no matter how rough it gets, I am going to try to hang on. Then, I cry at funerals, I think I should be rejoicing, because the dead are probably on their way to a better place. I don't have any predictions for the future, I am just living out each day, with no set schedule. I don't have to get married in a year, or I don't have to have kids within the next year. Usually I end up breaking plans, if I make them, so it is best for me not to make them. There are times of joy, but their is more pain and sorrow than happiness. I have actually lied in my bed and cried because of how much I hate the world sometimes. I used to think people were kind, but I had to learn the hard way.