Tuesday, July 01, 2008
The Countdown Starts Now Current mood: calm
Today was July 1, 2008, but it felt like June 31. I don't understand the person who created the calender, the days pass by quickly without having to cut a day out of the month. But, it would not matter to me, because I never be able to accomplish anything different because I have a routine. Most of the time I look forward to days off, when I leave work, the countdown starts, and I can predict that I want use my time wisely. I think I have developed a routine, that is hard to break, and that is the reason that I can't get pass this point, and accomplish other things, the things that I keep on putting off. I think everything depends on time, I think life, love, and education takes time. I'm always so in a hurry to get things done, because of time. From now on I don't care how long it is going to take to move mountains, I not going to be in a hurry to find true love, I am not going to be in a hurry to accomplish my goals, because eventually I will get there with time. Is is like I think I have all the time in the world, but I just need to slow down.
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Monday, June 30, 2008
The Mind Is Full Of Tricks Current mood: blah Category: Life
Don't always follow your mind, because the mind is full of tricks. Be smart, don't fall for it, don't be too quick to act when a thought comes to mind, take some time to think about it before you make the final decision. It is going to take some brainstorming, so be prepared to to flood your mind with thought after thought. Most of the time, you're afraid to follow a thought because of fear. Fear, is a feeling I just can't shake when I dealing with my thoughts. I really fear following my mind because it could be just a trick. Some thoughts can be hazardous, which are the ones you should try to avoid, when you think about something that makes you cry, you need to forget those type of thoughts, these are the thoughts that you should quickly erase from your memory. Forgeting is not magic, and it doesn't happen overnight, it is definitely going to take some time to get use to that thought not being there. But, why should you care, because you never needed it, it just wasn't natural, it was like an artifical substance or an additive, that was planted in your head.
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Sunday, June 29, 2008
The Path That Could Lead To A Dead End Current mood: confused
Could this be just all one big plot set out to destroy me, am I on the path that could lead to a dead end. How could something that you love all wrapped and decorated with bows be a trick. Pink on the outside, and black in the inside, so black til it is unidentifiable. I don't really understand all of the thoughts that occur in my mind, and sometimes I don't really think I should take them so seriously. It feels like my mind is an unsolved mystery, it is so hard to figure out what it is trying to tell me. I want to figure this out, and get to the bottom of this. I starting to realize that a good thought could just be a trick, and it is easy to caught up in it.
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Saturday, June 28, 2008
Where Would I Be If Not For Your Grace
It could happen, but somehow, luckily, I keep dodging the bullet. I think about it all the time, this feeling haunts me. I think about going out each time I'm on the scene. I'm still surprised that I'm still breathing after all of these hits. I definitely thank my lucky stars for this because sometimes the road can get rough and rocky. When I feel like I'm falling the angel steps in and I think to myself where would I be if not for her grace carrying me, in every season. I am starting to believe in her, because she is the only one that really cares, and when there is no one there to listen she is always there.
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Friday, June 27, 2008
Underneath All These Clothes Current mood: breezy
It is like I'm the thrill of your life, it is as if your world revolves around my life. Flattery is sweet, but this obsession that you engulf, is so undefineable. I still don't understand how I got to be at the center of your universe, an ordinary girl, like me just floating around in the world, just barely hanging on. I try to be as ordinary and normal as I can be but you still are attached to me. I try to be invisible as possible but you still see me. Maybe it is my inner beauty, because I don't feel it on the outside, but dressing yourself on the outside is so refreshing eventhough your flesh makes you feel green. You just don't know how ordinary I am. I may be hard on the outside but really soft on the inside, if you spend some time with me, remember I am just human flesh underneath all these clothes so don't be afraid to admire me.
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